For several years, I'd been depriving myself of a whole lot of precious little things. Little pleasures, pleasures big. Wait, why years? Ever since my early childhood. Always too reasonable, always knowing when to stop — even before I started doing anything. It surely saved me a bunch of bones, but was it really worth it? It now seems that the most I could have allowed myself indulge in were tree climbing and cellar stalking. (Not mentioning soccer and the games of this kind.) Always too reasonable despite my true nature. Oh where is it, then, this so-called 'true nature'.. It has become a habit: being too reasonable, being too cautious. I never said it were bad, but... sometimes it appears too hard to convince myself to dare do something.
Or was it coz I didn't have anybody to catch me when I fall..? Though nope, too silly.
But it really would have been so nice, having smb to climb all those rocks and rooftops with me, taking the rules of the game and violating them by creating his own on the go. Or hitchhiking, or spontaneously settling off to some crazy hike thru the wilderness...
What the ...? I just want to stick to smb who I would be able to live for
Silly little brat